I’ve always been pretty chilled and laid back.  I don’t freak out about every little thing that doesn’t go the way I’d want.  I’m the same way as a mother and you can tell with my wild boys and the crazy things they do.  Well, as crazy as a 4 and a 2-year-old can get. Things parenting books like to call milestones were never important to me. All that mattered was that Gael and Aiden were both happy and healthy babies.  This is precisely why I surprised myself by worrying about Gael’s speech issues when he turned three and his brother Aiden who was 1 year and 4 months communicated better.

The thing is it was more than his speech that worried me; it was his insecurity and his silence when other people were around.  Most of the time he ended up playing alone at the park and at playgroups, he didn’t speak for over a month at preschool and he would throw tantrums all the time.

We went to see Gael’s homeopath and he came to the conclusion that due to 3 ear infections in his left ear between 12 and 18 months his ear did not develop as it should have.  He obviously could hear but only process 2 syllable words and 2 step instructions.   His homeopath suggested that we de Tomatis, a listening therapy that uses Mozart music, Gregorian chants and the mother’s recorded voice.  WOW!  This is so my sort of thing.  Non-invasive and drug free, just how I strive to raise my children.

The Tomatis Method involved Gael having to sit for 2 hours listening.  Now that burst my happy bubble; there was no way he was going to let them put on the headphones AND listen to Mozart and Gregorian chants for 120 minutes each session.  But I just had this feeling that Tomatis was what we needed, and when comes to my kids I always trust my instinct.  So we tried it and he did it.  He sat there and listened hour after hour each day drawing, playing with toys and the other kids.  For 30 days I picked him up from school at 4:30 (Yes, 4:30 pm.  We lived in Spain then and their preschool hours were ridiculously long.) and we took a cab or the metro to and from Tomatis.

Just a month after we started Gael was able to repeat 3 syllable words; a few weeks later he was able to construct complete sentences.  Then the most amazing thing happened, he joined other kids in the park, told me all about what he did in school, he talked to my mom on an oversees call to the Philippines and he had less tantrums.  Just like that.  A blink of an eye and my Gael was happier, calmer and gregarious.

We moved back to Manila February this year and continued Tomatis right before he started at his new preschool.  Gael turned 4 in August and now I can’t get him to pause when he starts talking. A few months ago the most amazing thing happened, he started singing for the first time and he constantly sings throughout the day.  He plays football and basketball, goes biking with his friends and cousins without me around and I no longer have to translate what he says to others.

I am grateful to Tomatis for helping Gael be a confident and cheerful child, a child that uses his words and no longer lashes out for a good part of the day. I absolutely love hanging with this new Gael.  So do his dad and little brother Aiden.

-Article first printed in the Village Voice, February 2010